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    Letting go of tribe.

    It can be an amazing experience to finally find the group of people who feel like home to you: who feel like your tribe.

    You might have searched many years to find this delicious sense of resonance with others, this deep comfort of knowing that you are not alone, that in this group or style of people you can find rest, friendship, fun and love.

    Finding your tribe, being in your tribe, can be enormously fulfilling. It’s a way of practicing Oneness, to experience so much love in a group of people.

    However, it's important to understand that you don’t actually need a particular tribe to experience this. The tribe is merely a practice ground, for opening into group energy, and allowing yourself to feel Oneness.

    In truth, the heart can be filled anywhere on earth.

    As we grow, we learn how to feel Oneness, all the time, with everyone. If you’re in a tribe now, recognize it as a wonderful resting stop on your path, but not the end of your journey.

    Your identity with tribe is just one identity; chances are good, that you or the tribe will change, and over time, you will wander again into the wilderness, in search of new experience, new understanding and perhaps new tribe.

    Begin the task of feeling Oneness, with or without tribe. See how your understanding that the entire planet is tribe, opens you to more. 
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    Having compassion for our parents.

    In western society, it’s common to turn away from our parents in our teens, and to move away permanently from our parents in our 20s and 30s. Not everyone does this, but it’s a common path, a kind of rite of passage.

    We seek to find ourselves, outside of our ancestry and our lineage, and of course this is very useful.

    However, when we continue to distance ourselves from our parents past a certain age, without doing the work of healing what needs to be healed between us, this can stunt our growth.

    At some point in our lives, we need to come to peace with our feelings about our family of origin. We can decide to heal from past angers and hurts; or we can decide to separate fully if there was abuse; or we can take steps to come closer together.

    Doing this work is a part of our passage into true adulthood. 

    When we understand that our family members are souls, just like we are, we can see that these souls also have struggles and deep needs, met or unmet, just like we do.

    It’s tempting to play the victim or the rebel or run away from our childhoods. But that doesn’t bring us to great understanding. It’s when we finally work through our family issues, that we become whole.
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    Knowing when to stop.

    Sometimes we hold dreams in our hearts for so long, that when we do accomplish a dream, we don’t know what to do next.

    For example, if you’ve always wanted to run a marathon, and then you do run a marathon, what do you do next? 

    Do you run another marathon? Do you run five more marathons? Or do you just stop, right there. 

    We’re taught that we should press forward and take our efforts as far as possible… that if we’re not pushing the edge of our ambition, we’ve somehow given up too early, too easily.

    However… sometimes what a dream requires, is just to do the dream.
    And then to stop right there. No further efforts needed.

    This is because we often learn all we need to understand, in the process of accomplishing our dream. All the learning, change and growth has already taken place. Going further or doing more isn't important.

    If you have a dream, and are making your way to accomplishing it, take time to consider if you should go further, or if this is enough. 

    Sometimes it’s one way. Sometimes it’s another. 

    But it's good to understand that pushing further and harder is not always the best way. 
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    Taking small steps.

    Whenever you’re trying to do something big, like get a project off the ground, or lose weight, or quit an addiction, or shift the way you relate to someone, it helps to remember that you can get there with small steps.

    Working on your project every day after your regular work, will get you closer.
    Resisting wine or sugar or porn or whatever your addiction is, just for one day, will get you closer.
    Being kind to someone you have trouble relating to, will get you closer.

    We sometimes think we have to leap from Point A to Point B, when we’ve only just started out.

    But all it really takes is small steps, one after another.

    You can even go off the path now and then, or take a break and get back on it.

    With small steps over time, you can look up one day and see that Point B is much closer than it ever has been. 

    This lifetime, it's not a race. Many of our understandings, perhaps even most of them, won't even arrive to us in this lifetime. We many need many, many lifetimes to get to Point B. 

    The idea is to see how far we can get. 

    Big steps, small steps... it doesn't matter. Just keep walking the path. 
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    Getting hate out.

    Hate is a strong feeling, and it’s a hard feeling to hold.

    That's because hating someone or something makes us feel terrible; it causes us a lot of pain.

    What's more, even though we think hate might be the opposite of love, it’s not. Hate is caused by love. Love is about connection in an unconditional way; hate is about lack of connection in a conditional way.

    For example, we hate people who have betrayed us, we hate people who have injured us or let us down. Hate is about wanting to love, and being open to love, and then for whatever reason, having that opening into love being shut down.

    Hate comes from the pain of not having love.

    When you’re dealing with hate in your heart, look at what’s really there. It’s not anger, it’s not fear. It’s pain.

    If you find yourself in that place, take a break from hate for a moment, and acknowledge that you are feeling pain.

    Getting the hate out, is about feeling the pain, and then feeling compassion because you’re a human, and so is everyone else.

    If you can move into a state of compassion, the hate will dissipate, even if it’s just a little bit. Over time—maybe months, maybe a lifetime—you can remove it entirely. 
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    Heaven is here.

    A beloved student who had a terminal illness, wrote to me that she was experiencing meditations that contained extraordinary creatures and flowers, magical animals and colors that were the greatest delight and comfort to her.

    She wondered if it was okay to dive into this great delight, this heavenly experience in meditation. She wondered if this was serious enough work; if it would help her in her expansion. 

    In truth, this is one of the best uses of mediation: to bring us into states of rapture, delight, exhilaration, euphoria, nirvana, bliss.

    Sometimes we expand so much in this bliss state, we can’t quite make out what we are seeking or feeling: it's all a state of energy. Sometimes this state is very specific: we see beautiful creatires, color, animals, spirit beings in detail, with vivid understanding. 

    When you meditate, don't hesitate to enter int to this heavenly spot, this nirvana, this delightful other world!

    Remember: heaven is right here. We don’t have to transition, or in any kind of altered state to find it. We can experience nirvana any time. 

    This beautiful experience of magical animals, beings, colors, flowers, fairy folks and all that arrives in this state of blissful meditation, is designed to help us free our minds to new realities.