Dear Sara: I have recently had a falling out with my sister. This has been a long time coming. I find that this to be more painful during a pandemic and yet it is the very dynamics of the pandemic that brought decades of differences to a head. My sister is well meaning person and super conservative. The opposite of my leanings. The falling out was over safety guidelines and putting other family members at risk. A long pattern of her in my eyes not being present or awake. I have learned through psychic seeing that we have karma that spans many life times. I know that she has had negative impact on me in past lives and continues to impact my well being in this life. My question is, what is the soul lesson and what is the highest possibility for each of us? It is time for me to break free of this relationship? In doing so I will be leaving also her three children, their partners, and 17 grandkids. That is a lot. But they function as one consciousness in ways that one cannot be removed from the whole. I have not found that she has my well being at heart or capacity to step into a real exchange. Can you speak to this? — Janna
From Sara: Family karma can be really tough. We want to love our parents, children, siblings—but these are often the karmic crossings that trigger us the most. You are doing a good job looking at this from soul perspective and I know this is painful for you. However, I see a few misbeliefs. First, it’s not true that all of your sister’s relatives hold the same belief system that she does. Some do, some don’t. Some are quite evolved, or will become evolved as they grow. So, don’t give up there yet. Allow that they may change in the future. Second, you may not need to break from your sister permanently. Sometimes, it’s enough to take a breather from difficult people. By taking a breather, you place your attention elsewhere, and trust that the Universe will guide you both to deeper understanding. Let the relationship rest for a while—no contact or discussion needed—and remember, souls help each other. Even if you and your sister are in conflict now, you came into this lifetime to help each other learn soul lessons. Perhaps the soul lesson is that you can love the person even if you’re in conflict? There is the common thought that we must walk away from toxic relationships. and this is true for many people in many situations— but I am not seeing that for you at this time. You acknowledged that the pandemic has brought new things to your attention. This is one of the few gifts of the virus—it causes us to look anew. I would suggest that if you feel compelled to declare you are taking a permanent break, do so with the knowing that it will likely not be permanent. If you take a breather, do so with knowing that relaxation is always a good answer for problems that seem unsolvable. Just relax and let the problem rest. Finally, you can work soul-to-soul with your sister—a profound way of clearing karmic wounds without direct contact. Just go into meditation, and speak to your sister from your soul to her soul, no personalities involved. Say what you need to say—and listen to what she also expresses. Sometimes karma is complete and a relationship is finished for good, but I suspect for you and your sister, there are more soul lessons to learn together in this lifetime. This pain is leading to great healing, even if it that seems impossible now.