Dear Sara: I have recently had a falling out with my sister. This has been a long time coming. I find that this to be more painful during a pandemic and yet it is the very dynamics of the pandemic that brought decades of differences to a head. My sister is well meaning person and super conservative. The opposite of my leanings. The falling out was over safety guidelines and putting other family members at risk. A long pattern of her in my eyes not being present or awake. I have learned through psychic seeing that we have karma that spans many life times. I know that she has had negative impact on me in past lives and continues to impact my well being in this life. My question is, what is the soul lesson and what is the highest possibility for each of us? It is time for me to break free of this relationship? In doing so I will be leaving also her three children, their partners, and 17 grandkids. That is a lot. But they function as one consciousness in ways that one cannot be removed from the whole. I have not found that she has my well being at heart or capacity to step into a real exchange. Can you speak to this? — Janna
From Sara: Family karma can be really tough. We want to love our parents, children, siblings—but these are often the karmic crossings that trigger us the most. You are doing a good job looking at this from soul perspective and I know this is painful for you. However, I see a few misbeliefs. First, it’s not true that all of your sister’s relatives hold the same belief system that she does. Some do, some don’t. Some are quite evolved, or will become evolved as they grow. So, don’t give up there yet. Allow that they may change in the future. Second, you may not need to break from your sister permanently. Sometimes, it’s enough to take a breather from difficult people. By taking a breather, you place your attention elsewhere, and trust that the Universe will guide you both to deeper understanding. Let the relationship rest for a while—no contact or discussion needed—and remember, souls help each other. Even if you and your sister are in conflict now, you came into this lifetime to help each other learn soul lessons. Perhaps the soul lesson is that you can love the person even if you’re in conflict? There is the common thought that we must walk away from toxic relationships. and this is true for many people in many situations— but I am not seeing that for you at this time. You acknowledged that the pandemic has brought new things to your attention. This is one of the few gifts of the virus—it causes us to look anew. I would suggest that if you feel compelled to declare you are taking a permanent break, do so with the knowing that it will likely not be permanent. If you take a breather, do so with knowing that relaxation is always a good answer for problems that seem unsolvable. Just relax and let the problem rest. Finally, you can work soul-to-soul with your sister—a profound way of clearing karmic wounds without direct contact. Just go into meditation, and speak to your sister from your soul to her soul, no personalities involved. Say what you need to say—and listen to what she also expresses. Sometimes karma is complete and a relationship is finished for good, but I suspect for you and your sister, there are more soul lessons to learn together in this lifetime. This pain is leading to great healing, even if it that seems impossible now.
Dear Sara: Here are my questions: First, how are you viewing the latest world events from a spiritual perspective? Second, how might we bring spiritual tools to support new ways of being for those steeped/attached to the “left brain/logical/linear ways of operating?” Third, how have you personally responded to those who think your gifts are “woo-woo” or unimportant?—Amalia
From Sara: From a left brain/logical/linear perspective, the world is a great big tragic mess right now. It's very difficult for everyone, no matter which "side" you're on. In fact, much of the issues is because we're still stuck in the idea that we have to take sides. Belonging to or finding one's "tribe" iis an old idea, and we're being invited to let that go. From a spiritual perspective, we are going through growing pains—the kind of awkward, tumultuous, dramatic, emotional sorts of growing pains we might experience when we are moving through any big stage of growth: kindergarten, puberty, the 20s, the 40s, the 50s and beyond—all the passages where everything seems to not make sense, not work and not be right. In essence, we are letting go of who we were, and entering into a new stage. In the world’s case at the moment, we are letting go of extreme selfishness, greed and immaturity and all the strong beliefs that we and only we are "right"—and entering into a state of communal awareness—the understanding of collective soul. This is not an easy passage! A lot of ego must be left behind. In answer to your second question, in terms of bringing spiritual tools to help others, I would say: work on yourself first. As part of collective soul, each soul who drops ego lifts the entire collective. It’s impossible to provide understanding to someone who’s not ready for it—they literally can’t get it. So don’t worry about trying to shift others. Keep working your own garden. Act and live from the highest place you know how, and push yourself to go further. As collective soul expands, others will follow. If you want to pray or meditate on the world, do that—but your own inner expansion is what really lifts the collective. What affects one affects One. Thirdly, as for people worrying about if I am too “woo woo” or unimportant, I don’t concern myself with that. Today’s “woo woo” is tomorrow’s common knowledge. We each have a soul destiny, and once you know your soul destiny and commit to that, what others think is irrelevant. Some people will “get it” and some people won’t. No matter. The more important aspect is committing to your soul destiny and fulfilling what you are here to do.
Dear Sara: In the past few years as I’ve focused on learning how to connect with the guides and nature, my connection to God has changed. It feels weak and generic. I would have thought it would be the opposite. I do long for an experience of genuine connection. Do you have that experience? What it is like? Maybe my idea of God is too generic and impersonal now and that’s the problem.— Susan
From Sara: Sometimes when we’re raised with a religious tradition, we can attach to a particular way of thinking about who or what God is. Each religion has its own belief system, and especially when we are children, we tend to absorb this belief system. Thus, if a person prays to a deity from a particular belief system, this creates a closed loop—there’s no room for a different experience. Now, this works just fine for lots of people, and of course it’s a valid spiritual practice! However, if you are a person who has detached from religious tradition and are moving into the path of a broader spiritual awakening, your perspective has changed. You are moving from the personal (a deity has a personal interest in you) to the expanded (we are all part of the Universe). When we open this way, we start to experience Universe/God/One/All everywhere, all the time, and this may not involve any particular deity. The expanded view can at first feel a little lonely—where is the connection we were raised with? Yet as we explore further and let ourselves understand ourselves as souls, we begin to understand the Divine in a different way. In answer to your question: Yes, I do have this experience of direct connection, and I’m certain you can too. To me it feels like dissolving into everything all at once, and knowing you are a part of everything. And, if you want to have peak experiences, such as bliss, Oneness, losing your ego self and existing as pure soul—just ask. The Universe loves to commune with us in this way, as often as we will allow it.