My parents divorced when I was less than a year old. I see my dad on a somewhat regular basis. Both of my parents are remarried and have kids. I had some trouble when I was in the fifth grade when I told a former teacher about some dreams I had, and she started a whole hurricane of chaos in both of my families. So, I have strained relationships with most of my family on all sides. But because my stepmom and dad were right on board from the moment I found out about the crystal child thing, I believed my mom would be the most supportive. I was wrong.
She shrugged me off, and actually got mad at me when I tried to tell her. It was the exact thing that happened when I tried to tell her and my stepdad about some scary experiences I was having with a shadow figure in my room. I had hoped that if I talked to my mom alone, that she would be more understanding, because she always used to believe in this. Just trying to open up and share who I am. My good friend said that if my mom didn't believe me, then so what? She said I should focus on developing my abilities and not care what other people say or think. But at fourteen with almost zilch privacy, its hard to ignore my parents when they walk in and I'm working on this or reading about it.
Sara, what am I suppose to do? I talk like I have it figured out with my friends and my stepmom and dad, but the truth is, I'm completely lost. I don't want to start freshman year with the strains that I started eighth grade at a new school with. Do I continue with my quest? if so, what do I do if my parents come knocking and confront me about it?
Thank you for reading this. It's nice to ask someone who really gets it.:) - Jeremy
Dear Jeremy - I am so glad you wrote. You are a good writer and express yourself very clearly; that's a great gift.
First, you are who you are. You know that song by Macklemore, Same Love? The bigger part of that song is not just about gay rights. It's about this:
Live on. Be yourself.
And also, this:
... I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
Your soul entered the world, to the particular family you are in, for a reason. You might not understand this reason until you are in your 20s, or 30s, or 50s!
I'm sorry it seems they don't understand you, or don't know how to help you. That's very hard. But this is how it's been for many, many healers and intuitives and those who are spiritually aware. We don't fit in, we aren't understood — until many years later, when we get our on our own and can live as adults.
In your case... you are entering high school. This is your chance to line things up so that you have good opportunities to go to college or to take the next step for yourself, as an adult.Try to take advantage of this time, so that you will have a solid footing for the next step: being able to support yourself and take care of yourself, as an adult. I know it seems impossible now, but by the time you are a senior, you will understand that it has been one tiny step along the way.
The psychic/Divine stuff is important... but also, the practical stuff is important too. Learn how to pay attention to both.
I feel that your mom is actually quite aware of your abilities, and it's very frightening to her. I think she had these abilities, or those are in her lineage, but were blocked or not allowed. Understand that these abilities are new to the world at the level you have them, and that this is scary for many who were taught that opening and awareness outside of religion is bad.
You know... another thing is. You said you felt lost. This is normal at your age. Freshman year of high school is a bit... well, a bit of an adjustment. Know that you'll be facing a ton of change, your emotions will be all over the place, and this is just how it is as a teenager. You're growing, not just physically, but all other ways. So it's a lot to handle. It gets easier.
Finally, make very sure, and be very clear about your practices. There is no room for anything that is low vibration, old superstition. For example, you should never use a Ouiji board, or contact spirits without a Divine guide or Angel present. For you, only circulating in the highest realms you can reach. No messing with Goth or lower vibe stuff.