I am from India, 54 years old, married with two lovely daughters. The thing is, my family is beset by so many problems that I can feel no joy or happiness when I talk or think about them.
I do not have my own home. We made some rash decisions when young and did not save or invest enough and as a result do not have the money to buy our own home.
I have been diabetic and hypertensive since the age of 30. My health is not good, I have a frozen shoulder and sciatica in addition to my diabetes and hypertension and very weak leg muscles. My personal life has not been happy either. I was married when young and had a daughter when I was 23. I was not treated well by my husband and his family members and I left him when I was eight months pregnant. I raised my daughter as a single mother and was fortunate to meet my current husband after a while. He has been absolutely a wonderful father to my daughter and she adores him and looks up to him. My mother in law was not happy with my marrying my husband and she ill-treated and insulted me all her life. My second daughter was born with heart disease and this lady's response was that she had cursed me for marrying her son and that's why my daughter had been born with heart disease! She also favored her other daughter in law and daughter while handing out jewellery and gifts and I allowed myself to get hurt by her partial acts.
My elder daughter has been a learning disabled child and it was with great difficulty that I pushed her to complete her education. The doctors have diagnosed her as having a personality disorder. She also developed diabetes at the age of 19. She got married at the age of 25,an arranged marriage to someone known to our family and distantly related as well. She did not get on with her husband and in-laws and the boy was also at fault. After her divorce, she started working but can not keep a job for long but I can not say that she is at fault any of the times. She cannot get on with my second daughter and they constantly fight with each other. Right now, she is staying in another city but she has quit her current job as they were not treating her well and is applying for other jobs.She is lonely and wants to settle down in life.I feel she is down on her luck and needs a big dose of fortune!!
My younger daughter has finished her diploma in Art and design. At present she needs to focus on what she needs to do next.She is quite undecided about what to do but she also whiles away her time not doing anything much.She is very short tempered and loses her cool very easily. She suffers from acidity and severe menstrual cramps also.
I would like to buy or build a beautiful home of my own.I would also like my health problems to be cured.I am worried about both my kids. I want them to be loving responsible adults, loving to each other. I want my elder daughter to be favoured by Lady Luck, cured of her diabetes and personality disorder, find a good job and find someone she can be happy with. I want my younger daughter to be more patient and calm, be cured of her health problems, study further and find her vocation in life and settle down eventually.
Please help me Sara. Please guide me in attracting good health and fortune for my family. Thanking you in advance—K.
It must feel as as though you have a lot on your on your plate; as if there is a lot resting on your shoulders. I'd like you to look at two ideas, and see if they resonate with you.
First, the idea that you are a mother, but your children are grown. It is very hard to let go of the need to help, support, take care of and make things right for our children. And yet, that is the job of the mother: to raise our children as best as we are able, and then to let them go into the world, to make their own way. It's not that we every stop loving or caring for them. However, we do let the move into the world as individuals, with the understanding that they will have their own issues, their own soul lessons to learn.
We can't learn the soul lessons for our children. The process of growing up into full beings, requires that they learn these difficult things for themselves.
Thus, as a mother, it isn't your job to hover over in concern now that they are adults, or to try to help them with every difficulty. They are well equipped to take charge of their lives! It is time to let them go. Your role as the mother is done; it is time for you to step into a new role.
Again, this doesn't mean you don't love them or see them; you will always be their mother. It just means you energetically give them space, and recognize that the immediate mother role is done for you. That's a passage of your life, and that passage is complete. You are ready to move into a new stage of yourself.
Here is the second idea; this idea that Lady Luck is going to shift things for you. There isn't luck. There is only intention with action; listening to Divine guidance, and following that guidance directly. If you want things to change, you will have to begin to become clear on what you would like to create, you will need to ask the Universe for clear guidance on what your Highest Possibility is, and then you will need to move in that direction. It is here that you will begin to see shift and change. To understand this process more easily, I would suggest my course Manifest Miracles or Be a Divine Conduit. Both of these will help you connect into guidance more easily.
To wait passively for luck; this is a way of deciding not to be fully in your life. At 54, you are much too young to stop living, dreaming, moving toward your dreams. It is a transition to have your children grow up, and it is normal in midlife to review your life and have normal regrets and sadness. But it is also a time to realize there are many years again, and these years can be filled with connection, expansion and love.
Ask Sara with Sara Wiseman
Ask Sara is answered personally by Sara Wiseman, and shows you how to apply the concepts of spiritual intuition to everyday life.